Character Audition - Altrius

[Altrius]

Name (or nickname): Altrius

Age: 34

Race:Human

Homeland: [/b]((Still researching))

Profession: Skinning

Magical Specialisation: None

Weapon Specialisations: Swordsmenship and Axemenship

Pets/Steed/Companion: None

Description: As he sat in his home drinking his pint of beer Altrius sighed and lent back in his chair, hearing it creak under the weight of his massive body. He was a tall one, six feet five tall and with a broad and muscular body he was incrediably strong. As he sat there in his simple shirt his muscules stretched aganist the shirt showing off his wel toned shoulder, pectorial, stomach and arm muscles. Standing up he stretched and walked over to the mirror.

Looking at his weather beaten face it would have been hard to believe he was only thirty-four years old. His face beared the scars of many a fight and was haggard and dark, his sparkling blue eyes the only sort of youth in his face. His black hair fell around neck length and was tattered, twisted and seemed unkempt. Running a hand through it he sighed and walked over to his chair, looking as his trusty armour and weapons.

As he pulled on his plate armour he began inspecting it, admiring the workmenship the makers put in. It was black, with a gold trim and ornate symbols and runes on. His helm was horned, like a death mask and struck fear into the hearts of his enemies. Picking up his curved, spiked, ornate and deadly axes he sighed and sheathed them. It was time to get back into the fight.

Anything you'd like to add: I love to RP!

[Valalerin]

I'm afraid the character needs sharpening.

Your idea of a good character is fine, but it still needs sharpening.

First of all a person with dark hair has a lot of a certain pigment, this pigment is also in eyes and therefore the eyes must be dark (Brown is almost unanimous amongst black hair, though some may have green or black). My main gripe is his armour, it is black. There is no black metal, nor is there a dye for metal. The gold trim is also excessively expensive, only a King or high valued Baron could afford gold trim to his armour.
His weapon choice is also baffling, a good warrior wouldn't wield a spike weapon, they are far too clumsy. And a good warrior is unlikely to have an ornate weapon as it adds to the weight and size of it, making it difficult to wield effectively.

Shave your character down and give him a source of income please.

[Aux-ash]

Feb 18, 2008 22:47:58 GMT Valalerin said:

I'm afraid the character needs sharpening.

Your idea of a good character is fine, but it still needs sharpening.

First of all a person with dark hair has a lot of a certain pigment, this pigment is also in eyes and therefore the eyes must be dark (Brown is almost unanimous amongst black hair, though some may have green or black). My main gripe is his armour, it is black. There is no black metal, nor is there a dye for metal. The gold trim is also excessively expensive, only a King or high valued Baron could afford gold trim to his armour.
His weapon choice is also baffling, a good warrior wouldn't wield a spike weapon, they are far too clumsy. And a good warrior is unlikely to have an ornate weapon as it adds to the weight and size of it, making it difficult to wield effectively.

Shave your character down and give him a source of income please.

Black armour is not a problem, in fact most armour was polished to make sure it was not black (it usually started out as black.). The reason for polishing armour is to make it more resilient toward rust. But there have been plenty of cases throughout history when people wore black armour and simply put extra time in treating it.

Also any warrior wields a weapon he or she is comfortable with and a spiked weapon do have advantage over armour. If he is used to a spiked weapon then that is what he will use. Besides, a warrior relying heavily on intimidation (like he seems to be) will have a natural advantage over anyone not really wanting to fight him.
He'll have to pay extra to have them made though, of course.

I don't want to interfere with the auditions but I felt I had to defend those two points as they were quite reasonable and not impossible.

The character is much to heavily armed for a mere skinner though. Plate and swords are -very- expensive and anyone short of noble title would probably be arrested for theft for wearing it, regardless if they own it or not.
My suggestion is to either make him a noble, or a knight in the service of a noble (thus having the armour paid for) or shedding the equipment,

[Altrius]

(( I like Aux-ashs ideas. I can drop the gold trim bit, thats a bit pointless but like he said Alt does like to intimidate and strike fear into his enemies, which is why i want the black armour. Also, if hes skilled with spiked weapons, why cant he use them? Practise enough with them and you will learn how to use them. Well thats my thinking anyways. Ill drop the whole ornate bit on the weapons though. However If you really want me to change it all i will.

However im going to change his proffession. Using Aux's idea hes going to be working for a noble, cause a) its a great idea and b) it will explain his source of money.

Heres an edited one.))

Name (or nickname): Altrius

Age: 34

Race:Human

Homeland: Capital city of Hope in 'The Beauty'

Profession: Knight working for Noble Allan Strathbard

Magical Specialisation: None

Weapon Specialisations: Swordsmenship and Axemenship

Pets/Steed/Companion: None

Description: As he sat in his home drinking his pint of beer Altrius sighed and lent back in his chair, hearing it creak under the weight of his massive body. He was a tall one, six feet five tall and with a broad and muscular body he was incrediably strong. As he sat there in his simple shirt his muscules stretched aganist the shirt showing off his wel toned shoulder, pectorial, stomach and arm muscles. Standing up he stretched and walked over to the mirror.

Looking at his weather beaten face it would have been hard to believe he was only thirty-four years old. His face beared the scars of many a fight and was haggard and dark, his dark chesnut eyes the only sort of youth in his face. His black hair fell around neck length and was tattered, twisted and seemed unkempt. Running a hand through it he sighed and walked over to his chair, looking as his trusty armour and weapons.

As he pulled on his plate armour he began inspecting it, admiring the workmenship the makers put in. It was black set of armour, with ornate symbols and runes on, striking fear into his enemies. There were scriptures written on it, reminding him to always be true of heart and never falter. His helm was horned, like a death mask and struck fear into the hearts of his enemies. Picking up his curved, spiked and deadly axes he sighed and sheathed them. It was time to get back into the fight.

Anything you'd like to add: I love to RP!

(( The axes, i imagine would look something like www.black-bear-haversack.com/images/Single%20Head%20Axe%20with%20Black%20Handle.JPG

[engelbert]

*Waves* I'm keeping my nose mostly out of this one. Weaponry is Val's domain. I merely want to include this picture:

us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/greatsword_1985_31349581

It's a black suit of armour. It's plate armour in a full suit. Apparently the colouring is from a navy finish that simply seems darker and less blue when added to the metal.

Anywho... Though i find black suits of armour terribly clichéd for a 'baddy'... It is possible, and it would strike fear into an enemy as Altrius intended.

[Valalerin]

I will bitterly accept, however much I detest the idea of black armour I suppose Engelbert is right.

One last thing though; Axes don't have scabbards, they have holsters. And I wouldn't call them 'spiked axes' myself, rather regular axes with a spiked pommel and head.

Nevertheless, accepted.